Written by McKinnley Hinshaw:

I absolutely love reading and hearing about other women’s birth stories, but I didn’t realize how hard it would be to sit down and write my own! SO many emotions, feelings, core memories, and sacred moments occurred during the birth of our daughter and it feels almost surreal to write it out for others to read. Yet, I have never felt more empowered, capable, heard, and close to God as I did during her birth and I want to share my story so I can encourage other women that this is possible! I know that all births are vastly different, and I don’t want to make anyone feel like they failed if they didn’t get the birth story they wanted. Grief and regret post traumatic birth is a VERY real thing… I experienced it after the birth of my son! This is why I worked so hard and prayed for God’s blessings and protection over the birth of my daughter.

So before you read any more, please know that a wide variety of feelings and emotions surrounding your birth story is okay, no matter if it went the way you desired or not. I know every Mama would do ANYTHING to bring their precious babies earthside!

My son was born at 39 weeks and 4 days, although I was technically induced due to my water breaking early without consistent contractions, but that is another story for another day. Because of this, I had it stuck in my head that my daughter would come early, too. God had other plans. I had a desire this pregnancy to do things much more naturally by letting my body do its thing and lead to spontaneous labor, and I also wanted have a water birth. I was proactive and researched midwives in the area who would allow this and decided to go with Wendover OB-GYN in Greensboro, North Carolina. My midwives, Amanda and Daniela, were WONDERFUL and so supportive of my desires throughout my entire pregnancy. They were okay with letting me go past my “guess date” as long as baby girl and I remained healthy. This meant so much to me as I had felt so out of control and helpless with my first birth.

I had been having consistent Braxton Hicks most of the third trimester, but starting around 38 weeks I began having prodromal labor. Boy, was that so mentally draining! We would get excited thinking “this is it!”, and then labor symptoms would fizzle out and stop. This occurred 3 or 4 times over the next few weeks… then my guess date passed by… and then 41 weeks rolled around. God had given me an overall sense of peace and patience, but I definitely had my moments of despair. I lost my mucus plug the morning of my 41 week appointment, and I was having some slight cramping so I had hope that it would be time soon! I agreed to let my midwife do a membrane sweep at my appointment that morning at 11:00 to encourage things to move along, and that’s when we discovered I was already 3 cm dilated and 50% effaced. The membrane sweep did its thing and consistent contractions began on the way home from the appointment!

I already felt such peace, joy, excitement, and control - EXACTLY what I had prayed for.

I went home with my son, Hudson, and my husband went back to work for the afternoon. I was able to take care of Hudson and get him down for a nap as contractions were just uncomfortable cramps at that point. I continued to work through contractions by sitting on the exercise ball, performing the Miles Circuit, and eventually began to use the TENS unit for the increasing back pain. My husband texted and asked if he could work on his dove hunting fields that evening… I texted back “are you joking”. I guess that got the point across because he came home from work a little early and took our son outside for a while as contractions were still manageable and we were in no rush to get to the hospital. I have the most beautiful core memories of laboring in the yard on that blissful April day while Daniel rode Hudson around on the lawn mower and we took care of our chickens. I began to have to stop and breathe through contractions around 6:00 that evening, but they were still all over the place in duration and frequency. I called Amanda (the midwife on call) around 6:30PM and she recommended that we meet at the hospital around 7:30PM. I called my mom for her to come pick up Hudson, and then off we headed to Cone Hospital in Greensboro. We checked in to triage and I had dilated to 4 cm and was 60% effaced at that point, and could definitely tell that things were picking up. My midwife met with us and recommended that I continue to labor on my own for about 2 hours and then we would reassess.

Once in the labor and delivery room, we met our sweet nurse, Hannah, and we went over our birth plan and desires. She was so kind, supportive, calming, and helpful during the whole process. Our AMAZING doula, Kristian, also met us there shortly after we were admitted. I was still able to zone in and handle contractions on my own at that point. I would begin to breathe deep and direct my breaths down, focus on the fact that “I was made to do this”, and pray for strength and endurance. The presence of Daniel and Kristian were so calming and distracting as we would have conversations and laugh in between contractions and maintain the uplifting and peaceful environment that I desired. I labored on the birth ball, in the shower, and in side-lying on the bed with the peanut ball in between my knees. This last position was terrible and so uncomfortable for me when I was in labor with my son so I was resistant to try it again this time. But, while I was in the shower, I began to feel so tired and weak and knew I needed to rest. In side-lying, my contractions slowed down and I had a few 8-10 minute breaks in between them. This was a gift from God as I was able to nap and gain strength to be able to make it through transition and pushing. My midwife returned around 11:30PM and checked me, to see that I was still at 5 cm but was 100% effaced. She recommended breaking my waters then as she could tell that our baby was right there and that removing the remaining fluid in between her head and my cervix would move things along. I was hesitant to do this because of my birth history with my son, but we all discussed it and felt that it was the best decision. We prepped the tub so that it was ready for me to immediately get into after breaking my water. Amanda broke my water and into the birth tub we went around midnight. The water felt so calm, warm, and relaxing. I had this feeling of peace while at the same time becoming more nervous of what was to come.

Things began to intensify once in the tub and I began to be vocal and needed Daniel’s closeness and comfort more. Contractions were coming very frequently and were lasting 1-2 minutes. I was laboring either on all fours or in criss-cross, but it began to be where I really couldn’t find a comfortable position. I began to shake and this encouraged me that I was entering transition - I was so close to the end! I had heard so many stories of the difficulties of transition and knew to remind myself that this was the hardest part but that I had made it this far so why not keep going?
I entered “labor land” and my body started to take over to where I was less in control of my thoughts and words, and I remember telling Daniel “I can’t do this!”. He replied with “you have to!”. HA! He knew that’s exactly what I needed to push through and keep going.

I was feeling INSANE amounts of pressure with each contraction, and Kristian recommended for me to do a practice push and see if I felt like I was ready to begin pushing. This set off a chain reaction and I literally couldn’t stop pushing! I said “she’s coming!”. My midwife heard me roaring from the hallway and came in the delivery room at that point. I don’t remember everything very clearly, but she told me that she was assisting with keeping Addie from coming too fast and causing tearing/injury. I somehow was able to compose myself and take a short breathing break before I began pushing again.

I remember reaching down and feeling her head and realized that she had hair! I gave one more push on all fours and out she came at 2:05AM. I sat back and reached into the water to grab her and bring her up onto my chest. She laid there and looked up at Daniel and I with beautiful blue eyes, the sweetest little face, and the most precious dimple chin that runs on my husband’s side of the family. She had brown hair that only grew at the crown of her head and in the back. She was so calm and observant…those precious moments are imprinted on my heart and mind forever!

My placenta came quickly, and then we transferred back into the hospital bed. I ended up losing a good amount of blood and needed IV fluids, but I was on cloud nine and didn’t care about any of that! I was so freaking proud of myself and my daughter, and so thankful for the help and care I had received from my birth team. I emerged from Adeline’s birth with a new sense of strength, grace, trust, and surrender that I could only be granted from God alone. Birth is so beautiful, so raw, so hard, and what a privilege it is to be granted the gift and ability to bring new life into the world! I am so grateful to God for sending us our Addie Rae through such a redeeming birth experience.

He is such a good, good Father.