Healing After a Traumatic Birth: Finding Hope and Redemption
For nine months, we dream of the moment we’ll meet our baby. We plan, hope, and prepare for a beautiful birth experience. But sometimes, despite all our efforts, the unexpected happens — and birth becomes traumatic.
You might be left thinking:
“I don’t think I want to have another baby.”
“Maybe next time, I should just go straight to a C-section.”
These thoughts are completely normal — and valid. But they may also be a response to trauma, not your true desires. If this is you, you’re not alone.
In this post, we’ll talk about how to begin healing after a difficult birth. You’ll also hear an encouraging story from Kristian Jordan, a mom of three who overcame a traumatic first birth and went on to have two redemptive birth experiences.
Baby Blues vs. Postpartum Depression
After giving birth, your hormone levels drop significantly. That big emotional shift — combined with exhaustion and life changes — often causes what's known as the “baby blues”.
Common signs of baby blues are:
Feeling teary or sad for no clear reason
Mood swings
Trouble sleeping (even when baby is sleeping)
These feelings usually fade within two weeks. But if they last longer or feel heavier, it might be postpartum depression (PPD) - and it’s okay to ask for help.
Local Mental Health Resources (Greensboro, NC)
At Holistic Heritage Birth Services, we also offer postpartum doula support. You don’t have to go through this alone.
“God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.” – Psalm 46:1
Even in the hardest moments, you're never alone.
Finding Joy in the Small Things
In the early postpartum days, it can feel like the light is gone. But hope is never out of reach.
Start small. Ask yourself: What’s one thing that brings me a little joy today?
A silly face your baby made
A joke your partner told
Your favorite comfort food
Watching a bird outside your window
Let the tears come. Write it out. Talk it through. Let your body release what it’s holding. Healing begins with honesty and gentleness.
Thinking About Another Baby... But Feeling Scared?
After birth trauma or PPD, the idea of getting pregnant again can feel overwhelming.
Your fear is valid. What you went through was hard. It was intense. And only you know how deeply it affected you.
You may wonder:
“Should I just not have any more kids?”
“Maybe a planned C-section would feel safer?”
“Can I ever trust my body again?”
Here’s what we want you to hear:
You are strong.
You are not broken.
And most importantly:
Fear doesn’t get to make the decision for you.
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine.” – Isaiah 43:1
Preparing for a New Birth Experience
If your heart still desires to grow your family, preparation is key.
You’ve been through it once — and now, you’re more equipped than ever.
At Holistic Heritage Birth Services in Burlington, NC, our doulas provide trauma-informed support and guidance. We walk beside you through pregnancy, birth, and postpartum, helping you plan for a more peaceful, supported experience.
What About C-Sections?
Let’s be real: C-sections save lives, and we’re so thankful they exist.
For some moms, knowing exactly when they’ll give birth brings comfort. But for others, the longer recovery, lack of hormonal shifts, and difficulty with early bonding can be drawbacks.
There’s no wrong answer here.
What matters is: How do you feel about it?
What makes you feel most confident, supported, and safe?
Real Story: Overcoming Birth Trauma
An Interview with Kristian Jordan, Doula + Mom of 3
Kristian, founder of Holistic Heritage Birth Services, experienced a traumatic birth with her first child. She now shares her story to encourage other women that healing — and even joy — is possible.
1. How did you feel about trying for another child after your traumatic birth?
“I felt pretty nervous about trying for our second baby knowing... well, NOT knowing... what the experience would be like. Would it mirror the same as my first? Would I plan another home birth just to develop pre-eclampsia and have to be induced again? Would my baby have to go to the NICU again? Opening up your heart to your fears potentially playing out again is a scary place to be. But, The Lord granted me so much peace and openhandedness - I trusted that His plan was good and that He would walk with me every step of the way. In fact, that He would be ahead of each of my steps.”
2. What was your biggest fear and how did you overcome it?
“I think my biggest fear was that I would feel traumatized by my birth and postpartum experience again. Trauma during a postpartum season makes it very challenging to enjoy your baby and enjoy postpartum. I knew I didn't want to feel that darkness again. I'm fairly sure I had postpartum PTSD after the birth of my first baby, but I didn't know who to talk to about it or where to turn to. It was a dark season of my life that I did not want to repeat.”
3. How long did you wait to try for a second baby? did you feel mentally healed then?
“My husband and I waited about 2.5 years before trying for our second baby. So our firstborn was 3 years 3 months old when our second was born. We had always anticipated trying for a smaller age gap than that, but with the experience of my first, we opted to wait a bit longer. I don't feel like I had fully healed from my first birth experience by then. But with the support of a wonderful birth team who walked the journey with me, plus the incredible support of my husband, and the peace of The Lord, I had started to experience some healing. I did not feel like the Lord completely healed the pain of that first experience until after the birth of my second baby and a few years into being a birth doula.”
4. Did you ever consider a C-section out of fear?
“I personally did not ever consider a C-section with any of my babies. But I can see and understand why some moms choose that option - the idea of being able to schedule when you would go to the hospital, when you would meet your baby, those things can make some moms feel more at peace because it eliminates some unknowns. However in my situation, I don't think that the benefits would have outweighed the risks.”
5. Looking back, are you glad you tried for a vaginal birth with your second and third baby even though your first experience was so difficult?
“Absolutely. I’m grateful for those experiences. And I’m also thankful C-sections are there when they’re needed.”
6. As a believer, how did you see God's hands in the midst of it all?
“The Lord knows how many hairs are on my head. He has been with me every day of my life. Why would he forsake me during a challenging pregnancy, traumatic birth, or dark postpartum season? As believers, we are not always promised golden, sun-filled days. What we are promised is that God will never forsake us. I have felt His goodness and mercy all the days of my life, even the darkest ones. The Lord has answered so many prayers that I have prayed - and for those who have not been answered, I trust that He is the author of my life and that His ways far surpass any understanding I have. I can rest in that.”
7. What’s your message for scared or anxious moms?
“If your hearts and minds are riddled with fear and anxiety of unknowns, remind yourself that The Lord is the author of your life. He will never leave you nor forsake you. This world can be filled with pressures, anxieties, worries, pain - but those who trust in Him are promised an Eternity with Him that contains none of those things. We can rest in that. The Lord is the author of our births, our children's lives, and our lives. He loves you. ”
You Are Not Alone
To the mama carrying fear or sadness from a past birth:
You are not broken.
You are not weak.
You are not alone.
Your story is still being written. Let your next chapter be guided by truth, not fear. And if you’re ready — we’ll walk it with you.
“Fear not, for I have redeemed you…” – Isaiah 43:1
Will you let Him redeem this, too?
Need Help Right Now?
Think you might have postpartum depression or another perinatal mood disorder? Call your provider.
Having harmful thoughts? Please call 911 or the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988.
Want Support?
We’re here for you. At Holistic Heritage Birth Services, we offer:
Pregnancy and birth doula care
Postpartum doula services
Faith-centered birth support
📍 Based in Burlington, NC — also serving Greensboro, Chapel Hill, and surrounding areas.